Everybody's Talking


By Tommyhawk1@aol.com

*
Captain's Log: We have entered what Neelix calls "The Great Rift". For more than five thousand light-years, there will be no stars, no other ships, no contact. Our supplies are adequate, but we will have no chance of planetfall and no other resources for recreation than what we can find within the confines of our own ship. I intend to use this area of relative safety and the six months we will be within the Great Rift to give my crew some much-needed periods of light duty and plenty of off-duty time for recreational purposes.
*

* * * * *

*
Janeway sighed. It had seemed like a good thing at the time, this quiet leg of their journey. But now she was getting worried about her crew. Did they need to be shot at in order to keep from being bored? Chakotay, at least, seemed to be quite content lately, smiling and genial. Paris, too, seemed to be doing quite well, even if his frequent reaches up showed that, this morning, he was suffering from a stiff neck.
*
Chakotay got up from his seat and said, "Tom, you seem to be having some muscle stiffness. Let me work that out for you."
*
"Thanks, Commander." Paris said. Chakotay reached and began to vigorously rub Paris' neck and shoulders, and Paris responded with small sounds of relief and pleasure. "How does that feel?" Chakotay semi-whispered to Paris after a time.
*
"Great." Paris said. "But next time, can you go a little easier on me?"
*
"I'm sorry about last night. I got excited."
*
"That's okay." Paris grinned. "I was pretty worked up myself. You can make it up to me tonight."
*
Janeway and the other bridge members were frankly listening to this conversation.
*
"Yeah, I got some plans for tonight. I'll start with..." Chakotay seemed to notice they were being overheard, for he suddenly leaned over and whispered in Paris' ears. Paris' eyes lit up and he grinned like a maniac. "I can hardly wait." he said, obviously excited.
*
Chakotay raised up, smiled blandly at the goggling crew, and took his seat again.
*
Janeway considered the two. Could it be that Chakotay and Paris were---"Nah!" she said to herself. "I misunderstood them." She looked again at the two, who were giving each other very secretive smiles. "I think."
*

* * * * *

*
Paris went into the commissary, got his meal, ignored the waving hands of Kim and the two girl ensigns he was sitting with, and went over to a table-for-two where Chakotay was already seated.
*
"Can you believe those two?" Ensign Williams said. "Two months ago, they wouldn't have said six words to each other all day long. Now they can't get enough of each other."
*
Ensign Mukago had been Paris' co-navigator earlier that day. "I think they're getting all of each other they can handle." she said conspiratorially. She then motioned them over and gave them sotto voce a mostly-correct transcription of what they had said and done earlier that same day. "Can you believe it?" she ended.
*
"I don't believe it!" Kim sneered. "Tom's about as straight as any guy I've ever known. I've shared showers with him several times, and he's never given me a second look."
*
"Maybe you're not his type." grinned Ensign Williams. "I believe it, Hiroki. How long do you think they've been...." She wiggled her hand, palm down and fingers spread.
*
"I think it's been going on ever since that last shuttle trip they made for provisions before we entered this rift." Mukago said. "They went down on that planet together and ever since, they keep huddling up and whispering and giggling like a couple of teenagers. Did you know--" she leaned over to whisper again, "I saw Tom coming out of Chakotay's room this morning? And he was stretching and yawning. Just woke up." She nodded.
*
"You girls have overactive imaginations." scoffed Kim.
*
"The whole bridge crew overheard them today." Mukago said. "Explain to me what they were talking about. A stiff neck, sorry for getting excited, make it up to you tonight. What else could it be?"
*
"I don't know." Kim admitted. And the seed of doubt had been planted in his mind, as well.
*

* * * * *

*
"Commander?" Tuvok asked. "Why is Cargo Bay Four, which has been emptied of all supplies, still being supplied with an atmosphere? And one which does not conform to specifications?"
*
"I don't know what you mean." Chakotay said.
*
"The settings carry your authorization code. The humidity in the room is being kept at ninety-two percent of standard. Atmosphere is 115% of standard, temperature at 31 degrees Celsius, gravity at eighty-six percent of Earth normal."
*
"Oh, that!" Chakotay said. "That's, uh...."
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"That's an experiment that Chakotay and I are working on." Paris chipped in hurriedly.
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"An experiment?" Tuvok said. "Shouldn't the parameters have been input into the computer for monitoring purposes?"
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"It's a private experiment." Chakotay said.
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"Really. What are you experimenting on."
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"Fungi." Chakotay said.
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"Rock formations." Paris said at the same time.
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The two men looked at each other. "It's fungi on rock formations." Paris said insincerely.
*
"I see." Tuvok said. "Then can you explain to me why the only contents of that room contain neither fungi nor rock formations, but rather seem to consist of nothing but a steel cage and several pieces of leather and metal in the forms of lengths of chains?"
*
Paris and Chakotay looked at each other. "It's a secret." Chakotay said.
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"We'll share it with the rest of the crew when we're done." Paris said.
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"After all, we need a hobby during this slack time." Chakotay said.
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"Right." Paris chipped in. "And we don't wish to discuss our findings until we are concluded with our, uh, experiments?" he said questioningly.
*
Tuvok looked from one to the other. "Very well. I shall not make any further inquiries on this subject, so long as Cargo Bay Four remains completely sealed off from the rest of Voyager."
*
"We've already set the locks so only we can get in." Paris said.
*
"We need to go down there now and check on it. Can you cover the bridge for a moment or two, Tuvok?"
*
"Of course." Tuvok said.
*
The two took off for the turbolift. Just as it closed, the bridge crew overheard Paris saying, "Fungi? God, Chakotay, that's the lamest cover story I ever heard."
*
"And I suppose you can explain why rock formations need an atmosphere?" was Chakotay's only riposte.
*
And the turbolift was gone.
*
They returned over an hour later. Paris and Chakotay's hair were both in disarray, and Chakotay's jacket was askew. Paris was still sweating heavily and his face was flushed. He sat down, and as his derriere touched the seat, he went "Ouch!" Then eased himself down, grimacing, muttering, "Damn crazy Indian."
*
Kim was watching all of this, shaking his head. It just couldn't be! Not Tom, Voyager's own lady-killer!
*

* * * * *

*
When Kim went to the comissary, B'Elanna called him over. "Harry, can you tell me what's going on with Paris and Chakotay?"
*
"Nothing I'm aware of." Kim said.
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"Come on!" B'Elanna said. "I'm stuck down in Engineering. The whole crew is talking about how strangely they've been acting."
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"I don't think it's proper to talk about our commander and Lieutenant Paris in this manner." Kim said stiffly.
*
"I don't think there's anything strange about it." Ensign Lewis said. "So our second in command and our navigator have fallen for each other. I admit I never expected to see a pairing like that, but live and let live, I say." Her eyes glittered with second-hand love.
*
"They are not having sex with each other!" Kim nearly shouted. Every pair of eyes turned on him, and he sat down quickly. "We must be misinterpreting what we're seeing."
*
"Not only does it sound like sex, but it sounds like rather rough trade." mused Ensign Yuri Kasparov. "Cargo Bay Four, only those two can enter. Contents, a steel cage, leather implements, and chains. We are talking major kinky sex acts, if you ask me."
*
"Nobody asked you." Kim said.
*
Male laughter came in the door and it was Paris and Chakotay. The entire room went dead silent as they entered. They didn't seem to notice, so intent were they on their conversation. "I think it's time." Chakotay said. "I'll spend the ration points to get it. When do you want to pick it out?"
*
"I have to go take a shower. I'm all hot and sweaty, not to mention sore in spots." Paris said. "Say an hour, Replicator Number Two?"
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"It's a date." Chakotay said. "Neelix, what is your main course today?"
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"Is that an Earth dish?" Paris said disbelievingly.
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"Yes." Neelix said, very uncomfortable.
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"What's it called?"
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"It's from an island of Earth called Great Britain."
*

"But what is it?"
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"Uh, it's called 'spotted dick.'" Neelix said.
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"Hey, I like spotted dick." Paris said jovially.
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"I love it, too." Chakotay said.
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"Two servings for a couple of dick-lovers, Neelix." Paris said. "Make them big dicks, too." And he nudged Chakotay, who guffawed in response.
*
"Any other questions, Mister Kim?" B'Elanna said.
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"We've got to be misunderstanding them." Kim said desperately.
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"Really. Well, why don't we go stake out Replicator Number Two. As I recall, if you want an item replicated in leather and metal, it's the only one up to the task. We'll just watch them and see if we can get proof."
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Kim was at wit's end. "Sounds reasonable. And you agree that, unless we get proof, you'll all stop this nonsensical gossip at once?"
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"Fair enough." B'Elanna said. "Care to place a side wager on it?"
*
"No." admitted Kim bleakly.
*

* * * * *

*
Kim and B'Elanna were hidden behind some crates, watching Replicator Number Two. They had been watching for some time, and B'Elanna was smiling in triumph. Kim was sweating, watching the two.
*
"Are you sure you want it in black leather with metal studs?" Chakotay said.
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"Come on!" Paris said. "It's got to be black leather. Don't you see how macho it looks."
*
Chakotay reached in and pulled out the dog collar. "I just don't see it."
*
"Well, watch." Paris said and he put the dog collar on his own neck. Then he dropped to his hands and knees and growled. "See?" he said as he looked up from his position. "Don't you see a bulldog?"
*
"I see a French poodle." Chakotay snickered as he twirled Tom's curly locks.
*
Paris just laughed. "French can be fun." He admitted. "Yap! Yap! Yap!"
*
"Give up, Kim?" B'Elanna said.
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"No!" Kim said.
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"Oh, come on." B'Elanna said. "What's it going to take to convince you?"
*
"Can you get us into Cargo Bay Four?"
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B'Elanna considered it. "Sure. We'll have to crawl through some Jeffries tubes."
*
"Let's go." Kim said. "The answer has got to be in there."
*

* * * * *

*
B'Elanna operated the forcefield which kept Cargo Bay Four's atmosphere separate. They entered and immediately were sweating in the dry, hot, thick air, while the lighter gravity made their movements erratic and fatiguing.
*
"Just a bit more." B'Elanna said.
*
"Shush!" Kim said.
*
B'Elanna quieted. In the near distance, they could hear the cracks of a whip. "Up!" Chakotay was shouting. "Up! Come on, up!"
*
With each crack, Paris' voice was a grunt of effort, or pain, or desire.
*
"You can do better than that!" Chakotay said commandingly. "I want you up! Hyah!"
*
*Crack!*
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"Ugh, oh, God!" Paris said. "Watch it, Chakotay!"
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"Shut up!" Chakotay snarled. "I need silence. Now up!"
*
*Crack!"
*
"Agh!"
*
Kim sat down. "I don't know if I can see this." he admitted. "You were right, B'Elanna. Everyone's talking about this, and everyone is right. God, I never would have believed it."
*
"Well, I'm going to look." B'Elanna said. She crawled down the tube a ways and found a grille, sat on her knees and looked for a time. "Harry!" she hissed.
*
"No!"
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"Harry, get over here. You have got to see this."
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"I don't want to see it." Harry closed his eyes in pain.
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"You were right! I was wrong! Now get over here!"
*
Kim crawled, dreading the sight. But he was unprepared for the one that caught his eye.
*
Chakotay and Paris were in the cage. And there was leather all right and chains. But they were decorative items on a large bear-like creature. Paris was riding it while Chakotay wielded a whip, putting it through various circus stunts.
*
"Now up!" he shouted. And the bear-like creature, which had been running in a circle, jumped over a hurdle made of bars with Paris on its back, and Paris grunted with the sudden movement.
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"I'll be damned!" Kim laughed heartily.
*
"It's a moriba." B'Elanna said. "I read about them. They do stunts, but only when they have a rider on its back to guide it. Taming them take a lot of effort and coordination between the trainer and the rider. You have to crack the whip near the moriba and if the rider isn't careful, he gets hit by the whip. That would be why Tom was complaining about soreness and pain. He didn't get fucked in the butt, he got hit in the butt when Chakotay misjudged the cracking of the whip."
*
Kim was grinning with relief. "Let's get back and tell the others." he said. "It isn't good for morale to let everyone think their commanding officer is engaged in weird sexual practices."
*
"I wonder if they plan to surprise us with a show?" B'Elanna said.
*
And they crawled back up the Jeffries tube.
*
After a time, the computer announced. "Ensign Kim and Lieutenant Torres are no longer in Cargo Bay Four."
*
"That's a relief." Tom said, getting off the moriba. Chakotay flicked a switch and the portable hologram unit went off, turning off the moriba as well. "I was getting nauseous riding that thing."
*
"Well, at least that puts an end to the gossip." Chakotay said. "I knew fixing up this empty cargo bay would get someone in to spy on us sooner or later."
*
"You were right." Paris said with admiration. "Now we can do whatever we like, and no one will suspect a thing. They'll be too afraid to be shown up as fools."
*
"Yes." Chakotay smiled. "Once fooled, twice shy."
*
Paris walked over and said, "Now, what is your pleasure today, my lord?"
*
Chakotay considered it. "I think the leather dildo. You suck my dick so much better when you have that thing shoved up your ass."
*
"Can I wear my new collar, too?" Paris asked eagerly. "Please, Master?"
*

THE END